Perfectionism

A disposition to regard anything short of perfection as unacceptable; especially: the setting of unrealistically demanding goals accompanied by a disposition to regard failure to achieve them as unacceptable and a sign of personal worthlessness.
Source: Merriam-Webster's Medical Dictionary 2002

I was searching for a way to be perfect. A perfect house, a perfect body, to be a perfect mother and a perfect wife. I stumbled across a web site that I can't find now. There were a bunch of women that struggled with perfectionism. It wasn't what I thought it was. I thought perfectionism was a person that did everything perfectly and always looked and acted perfect. This was a group of women who were afraid to appear imperfect. They may not have looked or acted perfectly, or had perfectly clean and decorated homes, or spoke the correct words at the correct time. Some of them worked very hard at doing that, while others, just hid away from people so as not to appear imperfect. (That would be me, the second group).
There is so much pressure on us to be perfect. We see the perfect models, perfect Martha Stewart types, entertaining and keeping their homes immaculate. Then there's those popular, funny, intelligent people, that everyone wants to be around and be like. Is any of that real?
These people aren't perfect. The perfect model has problems and flaws, she can pick herself apart just like the rest of us. I read about women who needed their homes to be perfect and never let anyone come over because they didn't want their homes to be messed up. Comedians who are so "up" and outgoing on stage come crashing down eventually, leaving their families to deal with the fall out.
I discovered something a little while ago. I have flaws (sounds of shock and amazement fill the room). God forced me to look at those very things I denied were true for so long. It was initially hard to look at and admit, but when I did, I felt free to be just who I am without the pressure of being perfect.
The difficulty comes when I'm around other people. If I forget to pray and spend some time with God first, so He can remind me who I am. I start to look for approval from the wrong place and when I mess up and say the wrong thing, or my hair isn't right, or I spilled coffee on myself, It just starts to matter too much and I feel like a failure. But my Father God knows me and He always loves me and He can see who I am inside.
If I can remember that, the whole world could dessert me because I'll always know that I have Him to turn to, He's always there by my side.

Who am I?

Sanford and I have been reading "Victory over the Darkness" by Neil T. Anderson. He compiled this list to describe who you are in Christ.

Who am I?
I am the salt of the earth (Matt. 5:13).
I am the light of the world (Matt.5:14).
I am a child of God (John 1:12).
I am part of the true vine, a channel of Christ's life (John 15:15).
I am Christ's friend (John 15:15).
I am chosen and appointed by Christ to bear His fruit (John 15:16).
I am a slave of righteousness (Rom. 6:18).
I am enslaved to God (Rom. 6:22)
I am a son of God; God is spiritually my Father (Rom. 8:14,15; Gal.3:26; 4:6).
I am a joint heir with Christ, sharing His inheritance with Him (Rom. 8:17).
I am a temple-a dwelling place-of God. His Spirit and His life dwells in me (1Cor. 3:16; 6:19).
I am united to the Lord and am one spirit with Him (1Cor.6:17)
I am a member of Christ's body (1Cor 12:27; Eph. 5:30).
I am a new creation (2 Cor 5:17).
I am reconciled to God and am a minister of reconciliation (2 Cor. 5:18,19)
I am a son of God and one in Christ (Gal 3:26,28)
I am an heir of God since I am a son of God (Gal.4:6,7)
I am a saint (Eph.1:1;1 Cor. 1:2; Phil. 1:1; Col. 1:2).
I am God's workmanship-His handiwork-born anew in Christ to do His work (Eph. 2:10).
I am a fellow citizen with the rest of God's family (Eph. 2:19).
I am a prisoner of Christ (Eph. 3:1; 4:1).
I am righteous and holy (Eph.4:24)
I am a citizen of heaven, seated in heaven right now (Phil. 3:20; Eph. 2:6).
I am hidden with Christ in God (Col. 3:3).
I am an expression of the life of Christ because He is my life (Col. 3:4).
I am chosen of God, holy and dearly loved (Col. 3:12; 1 Thess. 1:4).
I am a son of light and not of darkness (1 Thess. 5:5).
I am a holy partaker of a heavenly calling (Heb. 3:1).
I am a partaker of Christ; I share in His life (Heb.3:14).
I am one of God's living stones, being built up in Christ as a spiritual house (1Pet. 2:5).
I am a member of a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for God's own possession (1Pet. 2:9,10).
I am an alien and stranger to this world in which I temporarily live (1Pet. 2:11).
I am an enemy of the devil (1Pet. 5:8)
I am a child of God and I will resemble Christ when He returns (1 John 3:1,2).
I am born of God, and the evil one-the devil-cannot touch me (1 John 5:18).
I am not the great "I am" (Exod. 3:14; John 8:24,28,58), but by the grace of God, I am what I am (1Cor. 15:10).